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Woof Wednesday: Doggy New Year’s Resolutions

by | Dec 29, 2010 | Dog Training & Care | 0 comments

It’s Woof Wednesday—and a good time to take stock of the past year from a dogs’-eye-view, and the year to come. The Magical-dawg romped through 2010 with only a few missteps along the way. It’s hard to keep up with his energy—but it’s good for me to try. So here are New Year’s Resolutions from Magic, with commentary by Amy.

Magic:  “I will train my humans to toss balls with better aim.”

Amy: He  insists on fetch both inside the house and out. So I resolve to keep breakables out of tossed-ball-range.

Magic: “I will kill all squeakers and chew sticky-out wrong parts on toys.”

Amy: He amputates teddy-bear ears, steals cat toys, and ends up with sparkly poop. I resolve to find a Magic-proof squeaky stuffed toy, and keep Seren’s catnip mice and sparkle balls out of reach.

Magic: “I will learn to swim.”

Amy: Magic discovered that the tank—that’s Texan for “man-made pond”—refreshes  inside and out—and provides pungent ambience. Drinking tank water made Magic sick from both ends. I resolve to find a healthier way to cool off my hot dog.

Magic: “I will train Amy to play with the magic-water ALL THE TIME!”

Amy: Magic obsessed over the garden hose used to fill his new doggy wading pool. He’s nearly figured out how to turn on the spigot. I resolve to get dog-proof spigot or risk outrageous water bills.

Magic: “I will steal balls back from thieving coyotes.”

Amy: Magic lost at least eight balls somewhere on the 13-acre property. Several failed the “will it float” test. I resolve to find fetch-able toys he’s less likely to lose.

Magic: “I will find more balls-with-legs and see if they bounce.”

Amy: Magic befriended at least seven box turtles, and “fetched” them home. No turtles were injured—and none were amused. I resolve to protect the wildlife from turtle-bounce dangers.

Magic: “I will go for a ride forever!”

Amy: Magic discovered car rides. He aspires to be a furry hood ornament. I resolve to invest in a safety barrier to keep Magic in the back seat and from behind the wheel.

Magic: “I will catch, fetch, and carry more-more-more Frisbees every day.”

Amy: Magic caught 2,043,713 Frisbees in 2010. Several did not survive. At least 2,043,706 are MIA. Remaining doggy disks get stacked and carried all at once—three or more at a time. I resolve to buy stock in fling-able dog toys, and re-invigorate the country’s economy.

Magic: “I will train Amy that naps together are a good thing. So are tummy rubs.”

Amy: I resolve to listen to Magic.

Happy (Doggy) New Year, folks—what are your dog’s New Year’s resolutions?  If you have a cat, please visit Feline Friday for the cat-version of New Year’s resolutions!

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Amy Shojai, CABC is a certified cat & dog behavior consultant, a consultant to the pet industry, and the award-winning author of 35+ pet-centric books and Thrillers with Bite! Oh, and she loves bling!

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